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News Brief's For July 18, 2014

By Misnomer on Friday, 18th July 2014 1:49pm
  » filed under Las Vegas  comments: 4


Harmon Demolition Crews Mistakenly Construct Defect-Free Harmon

Construction workers tasked with demolishing the defective Harmon hotel tower have instead built a defect-free facsimile of the high-rise building. Project manager Michael Fiorentino says the construction of the building apparently took place sometime between Thursday afternoon and Friday morning. "When I turned it over to the night crew, things were going like they should. Guys were busting out glass, smashing concrete - demo stuff. But when I got here this morning, there was a 49 story building sitting here." Fiorentino speculates that confusion arose when workers were provided with the building's plans to aid in its demolition. Instead, they constructed a new building.

County building inspector Jim Miller confirmed that the new structure is compliant with all state and local building codes. "I've been up and down this thing, and I gotta tell ya, it's perfect. Pristine even. Those guys did a hell of a job." But the news is not all positive, and the new structure was built directly on top of the existing, defective Harmon building. "Oh yeah, the whole thing has gotta come down," said Miller, adding, "Damn shame too." In light of the new construction, lawyers for MGM Resorts International have filed new motions in court, and all work on the building has ceased. Litigation is expected to take several years.

New Fremont Street Regulation Further Limits Alcohol Consumption

The City of Las Vegas, as part of its continuing effort to limit alcohol consumption on Fremont Street, has passed a new regulation that changes the way Downtown visitors can legally enjoy adult beverages. Under the prior regulation, Fremont Street patrons were prohibited from consuming alcoholic beverages from bottles, cans, or glasses, though plastic cups were permitted. The new rule limits drinkers to whatever alcohol they can carry in their cupped hands. Councilman Steve Edgars explains, "This is an effort to protect Downtown visitors from the unsavory behavior that often accompanies overindulgence in alcohol."

Reactions to the new law were mixed. Teresa Murphy, vacationing from Eu Claire, Wisconsin, did not believe the purported public safety benefit of the rule outweighed its inconvenience. "This is bullshit!" exclaimed Murphy, gesturing wildly with her hands and losing most of her Jack and Coke in the process. Her husband Tom echoed her concerns, showing a reporter his fingers, which had turned blue under the chill of a frozen margarita.

Others seemed to like the new law, and found it to have additional benefits. Harland Worley, a tourist from San Francisco, cradled an Anchor Steam beer in his palms and spoke of its positive effect on the environment. "Think of all the plastic cups we're saving!" But didn't Worley think the rule would limit his ability to enjoy his visit to Downtown Las Vegas? "Nah, not at all. It's more about the lights, and the atmosphere anyway. I can sip a couple beers from my palms and let that be enough, you know? Besides, I'm still pretty high from the angel dust."

Tagged: misnomer   


Comments & Discussion:

Can I bring my own dixie cup?

No, the only paper cups allowed are origami ones. So swipe some odds sheets from one of the sports books and get folding.....


That would make for an incredible episode of Engineering Disasters. You actually might have a shot of getting the History Channel to pick it up, just make an implication the construction crews were also aliens.

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