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News Brief's For June 7, 2013

By Misnomer on Friday, 7th June 2013 2:22pm
  » filed under Las Vegas  comments: 3


News Briefs

Busker Just Thought Of A Great Idea No One Will Get

Eugene Martin, a busker who earns his living in tips while standing outside of the Paris casino dressed as Albert Camus, just had a great idea that no other living person will appreciate or find amusing. Martin, recently informed of MGM Resorts plan to build an outdoor pedestrian mall known as "The Park" in front of the New York New York and Monte Carlo casinos, decided to change characters. "Shakespeare. Shakespeare in The Park. It's perfect!" thought Martin, unaware that precisely none of the thousands of tourists who will pass him on a daily basis will have the first clue whom he is portraying. Martin is similarly unprepared for the constant, recurring question he will endure, "Who are you supposed to be, Cervantes?"

Downtown Project Buys Blackjack

The Downtown Project, headed by Zappos.com CEO Tony Hsieh, has added another asset to its ever-expanding portfolio, announcing today that it has purchased the game of blackjack. The acquisition comes on the heels of the Downtown Project's recent purchase of the Gold Spike Casino, which it subsequently converted into a non-gaming facility featuring shuffleboard and billiards. While the Downtown Project has been vague with regard to its intentions for the newly acquired international card game of skill and chance, analysts expect that the wagering element of the game will be eliminated, and the rules altered so that it more closely resembles the pastime "Go Fish". Analysts also predict that Hsieh will be heralded as a visionary for the game's transformation.

Casino Royale And Golden Gate Cross-Market Value Priced Refreshment

They say that two great tastes are better than one, and now two Las Vegas casinos are working together to bring the value conscious consumer a treat they won't soon forget. The Casino Royale, famous for its one dollar bottles of Michelob beer, and the Golden Gate, which since 1959 has offered a bargain priced shrimp cocktail, have joined forces to introduce the Mich-A-Shrimp Cocktail. Selling for $3.99, the concoction features a bottle of Michelob Lager topped off with a generous portion of salty ocean shrimp and tangy cocktail sauce.

Casino Royale Food and Beverage Director Jan Singletary explained how the Mich-A-Shrimp Cocktail came to be. "We're always looking to provide our customers with outstanding value. We serve thousands of one dollar Michelob bottles every day, a great price for a beer of that quality. But we're always striving to do more, and we thought, you know, every beer we open has that little bit of headspace - what if we filled that with something and gave our customers more of a good thing? That's when we reached out to Golden Gate."

Golden Gate spokesperson Jason Randall admits that his people were initially skeptical. "When they first came to us with this idea, we though, hey, we've been serving our shrimp cocktail the same way for over 50 years. Why mess with a good thing? But when we tested, we noticed right away that our customers loved it! They especially liked the portability, the fact that you can take the Mich-A-Shrimp Cocktail out onto Fremont with you, and enjoy it as you walk around. It really is the perfect summer refreshment."

Interviewed under the canopy of the Fremont Street Experience, Doug Littlefield, a vacationer from Bowling Green, Kentucky, agreed. "I've had five of these," said Littlefield, wiping the sweat from his brow. "It's something to drink, it's something to eat, and it won't set you back too bad." The Mich-A-Shrimp Cocktail is available at both the Casino Royale and the Golden Gate for the duration of the summer months.

Tagged: misnomer   


Comments & Discussion:

Greatness. Not sure if you take requests, but looking forward to a spoof of the Eurasia release oh-so-much.

Wouldn't Shrimpelob have worked better?

Nothing about that fiery guy opening a restaurant in the Quad? Or do you not like to kick a man when he's down?

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