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Tienen Una Coca-Cola y Una Sonrisa

By Misnomer on Wednesday, 16th March 2011 2:16pm
  » filed under Las Vegas  comments: 19


Cosmopolitan Pizza Hallway Records

If you're anything like me, you're currently sleeping on a friend's couch and taking the bus to work while your court case gets worked out. But you and I may share another similarity if you've ever purposely avoided the clusterfug of humanity that is the GameWorks/M&M Store/Coca-Cola Store section of the Strip. That was typically my practice until one recent warm Spring day, when the sight of the giant Coke bottle made me recall a New York Times article I'd read about "Mexican Coke".

Mexican Coke is made with pure cane sugar, as opposed to the U.S. variant, which is sweetened with high fructose corn syrup. Might the Las Vegas Coca-Cola Store have what sounded to me like the most delicious thing to come out of Mexico since the Cheesy Gordita Crunch? My interest was piqued. I made my way through a fat mass of tourists, who were perusing Coca-Cola branded glasses, panini presses, and toilet plungers. In the back of the store, in a refrigerated case, I found what I'd come for.

Tall, curvy, and perfectly feminine in form, if your ideal woman is armless and legless with a flat top haircut. Ice cold. It's bottle made from green glass so thick it resembled the lenses of a person with really thick eyeglasses. Sealed with a bottle cap so tightly, it took two store clerks and a six foot pry bar to open. An absolute steal at $3.00.

I took a sip. Instantly, I was transported back to my youth, when I worked as a stable boy in a Tijuana donkey show. The Coca Cola was sweet, but not overpoweringly so. It tasted spicy, like cola, and not at all like office-vending machine sadness, like every other Coke I've had in the last 20 years. It had powerful effervescence; so powerful, that it bubbled up through my nose and out of those little tiny holes you have in the corner of your eyes, but forget about until you sneeze really hard.

It was delicious. Standing right there in that store on the Las Vegas Strip, I had a Coke and a smile, and an erection. I walked down the Strip, sipping my Coke, until a friend and I decided to grab a slice at Cosmopolitan's "secret" pizza place. The salty pepperoni slice I chose was the perfect compliment to my sweet elixir.

As we left the secret pizza place, my friend noted that the long, dark hallway leading from the restaurant somewhat resembled a stadium tunnel, and I, with my Coke bottle, somewhat resembled Mean Joe Green, as seen in the iconic Coca-Cola commercial. He was right, and reenacting that famous scene, I finished my Coke and said to him, "Hey kid, catch." And I would have tossed him my shirt, had I been wearing one.

Do yourself a favor: Go get yourself a Mexican Coca-Cola the next time you're walking the Las Vegas Strip. "Tienen Una Coca-Cola y Una Sonrisa," which translated from Spanish means, "The drug mule arrives at sunrise." Cheers!

Tagged: misnomer   


Comments & Discussion:

You can actually find Mexican Coca-Cola, and sometime Pepsi and other soft drinks at Mexican bakeries, Latin grocery stores, or at convenience stores that are located in areas in which the clientele are predominantly those from south of the border. In the majority of these places, these are gray market imports not entirely endorsed by Coca-Cola or it's distributors.

You're right about it transporting you back to your youth. It really is like the Coke we grew up with before they decided to screw with it.

I know that Pepsi, Mt. Dew, and Dr. Pepper have been doing their "throwback" versions, but they still aren't completely like they used to (Although Dr. Pepper's is the closest, since some of their bottlers in Texas still use sugar in theirs.).

Is Mexican Coke the same idea as that Pepsi Throwback stuff? Like Pepsi Throwback, but the Mountain Dew is awful.

Try Italian coke. You would lick the sweat off Big Elvis's thighs to get that taste out of your mouth.

Ahh, we call it the "Mexican Coke" as well. Living on the South Texas coast, the "Mexican Coke" can be purchased by the case. You can get it in nearly all the "Taqueria's" (Jalisco Mexican Style Food) here as well.

It is a treat to enjoy the clean crisp taste of a "Mexican Coke" now and then. It does take me back to when I was a kid. The only cola you could get around here was Coke and enjoy it with a bag of Fritos.

Hey that's one perk of living here. I'll drink to that!

Not burst any (coke) bubbles, that "Mexican Coke" that you are drinking, is not "Mexican Coke" at all. It's made here in the good 'ol US of A.
The bottlers even tilt the label to make it look, I don't know, genuine?!

I'm sure it's still enjoyable and made from sugar, though.

Another great place to get it is a little joint called The Beat inside Emergency Arts in Downtown LV

China Pablano at Cosmo was serving what they were calling Mexican Coke too. Not sure I noticed much of a difference honestly but I was pretty hung over.


Costco here in the DFW area sells it by the case.

I've occasionally gotten really good, strong Coke from some fountains set to a really strong mix, and once from a bottle, but it is really hard to find in the USA. *sad face*

One of the best parts of living in Phoenix: Mexican Coke at half the convenience stores in town. And by the case at Costco. If you see I'm coming up, let me know and I'll snag a case for ya before I head up.

I don't know how they do it, but the Coca-Cola from the fountains at In-N-Out Burger is a dead ringer for Mexican Coke.

Vespajet: The secret with Dr Pepper is to track down Dublin Dr Pepper; they're the ones best known for still using sugar. Jason's Deli carries it on their soda fountain.

Stevecovington: Mexican Coke is the original formula for Coca-Cola, before the New Coke debacle and the subsequent switch to high fructose corn syrup in "Classic" Coke.

Nodeuces: You sure someone didn't just give you Beverly and tell you it was Italian Coke?

Saharalv: Pretty sure that "Hecho en Mexico" on the label means it was imported.

They sell Mexican Coke at the gift shop in Aria, use that to mix up a Jack & Coke.

Oh...forgot to mention there's also Passover Coke - never seen it outside NYC, but they sell it around Passover since they're not allowed to have corn syrup, tastes just like Mexican Coke.

Outstanding as always.

like GreenSideUp said, they sell it at Costco by the case. Same for Sam's club. At the local grocery store (Kroger), they often sell them for $1/bottle. Now THAT'S a steal.

You can also get Mexican Coke, and Mexican Squirt at El Segundo Sol, located in front of the Fashion Show Mall.

Kosher coke is essentially the same as Mexican Coke since its also made with pure cane sugar so that it passes muster with the Rabbis. Its everywhere here in Chicago during passover. Mexican Coke can also be had almost everywhere....it is indeed delicious.

hilarious post by the way.

@nodeuces I agree on the Italian Coke. I drank it cause i had just gotten off then plane and had an insane case of jet lag!!!

I've never had the Italian Coke, but I do like Beverly, which is a Coca-Cola product sold in Italy that is probably one of the least liked offerings at the World Of Coca-Cola.

We get Passover Coke in DC to. That's good shit.

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