Grand Theft Auto: Las Venturas

Guest columnist Carl Johnson takes us on a tour of Las Venturas

Posted by Carl 'CJ' Johnson

This is the old Las Venturas Strip downtown. That neon cowboy's name is Venturas Vic. His ho, Venturas Vicki is right down the street. She's got a nice booty for a 50 foot tall ho.

I played some No Limit Texas Hold 'Em at this place. Got beat... but I shot a coupla punk ass internet poker playing bitches and took their money. Check out the legs on that bitch.

I went to this joint cause Chuckmonster said their Turkey burgers are dope. They suck ass. Chuckmonster is an asshole.

On the way back to the Camel's Toe, I stopped off at the Visage cause there's supposed to be fly bitches there. I had two gin and tonics then split.

When I got back to the Camels Toe, I climbed out my window and checked out the view from the top of the pyramid. Tommorrow, its back to the hood in Las Venturas. Fuck Las Venturas man - gotta keep it real.


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